Poke Me In The Eye

If you had to be afflicted with one of these serious handicaps, which one would you choose?

Moe’s Answer

Any of these afflictions would be terrible to have and I mean to disrespect to anyone who may be suffering from any of them. I think the worst of the bunch would be blind. I can’t imagine going through life without the gift of site. Not being able to see the ocean waves, see the face of your parents, to be able to look into someones eyes. My mother used to work with the blind, she worked for a company that sold braille printers and other things for the blind. During that time I got to meet some pretty amazing blind people. One of them was a man named Jerry. Jerry gave walking tours of San Francisco and was a pretty amazing man, he could go walking around in San Francisco, he could have been walking for hours and he could stop and tell you what store he was standing in front of. Another of the people that I met at this time was a man named Michael May. Michael just released a book called “Crashing Through“. Michael was blinded as a boy and a few years ago he underwent an operation that gave him some of his sight back. Michael is a very amazing man. He held a record for downhill skiing, he rode a motorcycle, he would hike alone in the woods. Even seeing these people and seeing the amazing things that they achieved I still think it would be the worst of the three.

I think the second worst would be being deaf. Not being able to hear people speak, not being able to go to the movies, not being able to hear music. I just can’t imagine life without sound.

That brings me to my choice if I had to choose, being mute. Yes it would suck not being able to speak but I think it would be the least disabling of them. You would still be able to communicate via sign language or writing. You would still be able to movies and television and you could still drive a car. It would just be the easiest of the three to deal with on a day to day basis.

Crawford’s Answers

Would I rather be deaf, blind or mute?

At first though this seems like a pretty easy one to answer. I certainly wouldn’t choose blind…I mean hell, I couldn’t see! That would certainly stop me from driving…which I love. And seeing things is good! I like to see things. On the other hand my other senses would become so much more in tune with the world. But would great hearing, smell and touch make compensate for the lack of sight? Hell no.

Deaf would be an interesting one. I can imagine how serene life would be if I couldn’t hear blaring horns, people jabbering, crying babies, leaf blowers…all those sounds that irritate us. But then I think how scary that would be. You’d constantly be caught off guard by things. People could sneak up on you so easily. Mmmm…no thanks, I like to hear.

Mute…that’s an interesting choice. Of course I wouldn’t want to lose any of these things but I think being mute would be the lesser of all evils. Sure communication would become extremely difficult. My handwriting would need improvement. People would react strangely to my shortcoming and there would definitely be strife. But I still would be able to see (and drive!), still would be able to communicate (my fingers aren’t broken), still would be able to hear and understand what people are saying to me without any struggle.

So I choose mute. And I’m not going to say a word for the rest of the night.